Once I recognize there is an opportunity for sex, I get in my head. Sometimes the natural flow of things can help me overcome it but once I’m in my head I feel like there’s a blood shut off valve headed that way and it’s stuck closed haha
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My inner critic is a kid version of myself. Fat and needy. He finds himself unattractive. It shows up the most when there is build up to sex. And it’s the loudest when I’m not hard. He is silenced when I’m aroused.
My inner critic shows up immediately when I know a sexual encounter could arrive. It constantly reminds me that I wont get hard and I am not good enough
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My inner critic shows up early to the party. Earlier in the day before I know I’ll be seeing someone later. It will start to suggest “what if” scenarios. Then in the moment of starting to get hit and heavy it’ll cause me to go into spectator mode. I’ve also started to notice if will show up at other times of the day, too, in non-sex related things… typically with a worst case scenario thought.
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My inner critic comes out during anticipation and makes me over aroused
I feel the inner critic as soon as I think about sex and the nervousness can build throughout the day. It gets stronger during foreplay. As soon as I start getting hard I worry I won’t be able to stay hard.
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My inner critic is loudest after I’m already in my head about what it has said, I go soft, then it’s game over- because now I feel like I’ve disappointed her as much or more than I’ve disappointed myself.
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My inner critic blocks me from enjoying kissing, as I’m just worried about it escalating.
Mine shows up just before sex and after, mocking me.
My IC makes me worried about getting hard right when I know I have a date and during foreplay. I don’t mind kissing and touching because I feel confident doing it. But when it escalates there’s always this all-or-nothing moment and if it shows up then it’s hard to shake it away specially because I always feel the stress of time (her time specially).
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I just somewhat shamefully realized that sometimes my inner critic shows up as criticizing my partner. It makes me aware of things about her that make me shy away from sex (hence protecting me from facing failure there)
My IC tells me that I’m not good enough at sex for her to enjoy it and that I won’t get hard again this time.
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My inner critic waits until I’m having sex then, boom, he pops up telling me I’m not going to be able to cum and she’s going to be disappointed in me. Which then becomes a self fulfilling prophecy
That it starts off as a small black cloud the moment I know sex is on the table but then it explodes and grows rapidly the moment just before penetration
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IC usually turns up before I have sex or when I know I’m about to have sex and I’ll need to go somewhere private to have a word with myself that everything is going to be ok, but feels like that’s already putting pressure to perform well on before I’ve even started
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It’s always kind of lingering, but it’s most intense when I’m thinking about having sex, and especially just beforehand.
I think it’s always there but right before I have sex or even during, it can get worse and worse. I can think about it for the days after as well.
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First thought of sex and the IC shows up.
Every time I’m in a date when is time to ask her to go back home togheter my IC start to put doubts about my ability to have an erection at the point that I have to withdraw and go home alone
IC shows up only when it’s go time.