# What has stopped you from communicating what you need to be able to orgasm during partnered sex? **URL:** \ **Category:** ❓ Course questions\ **Tags:** course-question, find-orgasm-course\ **Created:** [June 19, 2026, 12:28pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585 "2026-06-19T12:28:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![viv-mojo](https://dub1.discourse-cdn.com/flex005/user_avatar/community.mymojo.com/viv-mojo/32/369030_2.png) [@viv-mojo](https://community.mymojo.com/u/viv-mojo)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2026, 12:28pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/1 "2026-06-19T12:28:17Z")
Share your answers with others in the course. ---
**Author:** ![misty-blush-squid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@misty-blush-squid](https://community.mymojo.com/u/misty-blush-squid)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2026, 5:24pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/2 "2026-06-19T17:24:44Z")
Not knowing what I liked, feeling embarrassed to say ---
**Author:** ![resonant-turquoise-roundworm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/cab0a1/32.png) [@resonant-turquoise-roundworm](https://community.mymojo.com/u/resonant-turquoise-roundworm)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2026, 8:29pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/3 "2026-06-19T20:29:41Z")
Not knowing how to explain what I need and having a partner who is silent and quick ---
**Author:** ![parallel-olive-cuckoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/df788c/32.png) [@parallel-olive-cuckoo](https://community.mymojo.com/u/parallel-olive-cuckoo)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2026, 3:29pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/4 "2026-06-20T15:29:44Z")
It feels like I can only orgasm when I have a toy way way up inside me. ---
**Author:** ![important-blue-felidae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/53a042/32.png) [@important-blue-felidae](https://community.mymojo.com/u/important-blue-felidae)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2026, 1:04am UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/5 "2026-06-22T01:04:51Z")
I don’t necessarily know what to tell them ---
**Author:** ![previous-black-haddock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bbe5ce/32.png) [@previous-black-haddock](https://community.mymojo.com/u/previous-black-haddock)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2026, 3:04pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/6 "2026-06-22T15:04:14Z")
Worrying that they won’t be interested or turned on by what I need to orgasm (toy and tightening/straightening of my legs). Feeling silly for needing something so specific, and not being able to orgasm from penetration alone. ---
**Author:** ![direct-chocolate-panther](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ec9cab/32.png) [@direct-chocolate-panther](https://community.mymojo.com/u/direct-chocolate-panther)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2026, 8:05pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/7 "2026-06-22T20:05:00Z")
I feel like I rely so heavy on toys now that when he touches me I don’t actually know what I like/sometimes it hurts because I don’t know how to express what I want. Last time I tried using my hand it took ages and I get in my head about that with my partner so I just fake it ---
**Author:** ![direct-chocolate-panther](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ec9cab/32.png) [@direct-chocolate-panther](https://community.mymojo.com/u/direct-chocolate-panther)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2026, 8:05pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/8 "2026-06-22T20:05:48Z")
I relate to this (tightening and straight legs) it’s hard to get there any other way and having someone in between your legs at the time can make it even harder ---
**Author:** ![outstanding-olive-catshark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ed655f/32.png) [@outstanding-olive-catshark](https://community.mymojo.com/u/outstanding-olive-catshark)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2026, 1:30am UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/9 "2026-06-24T01:30:47Z")
I never orgasmed til I was about 30 years old. And it was amazong and during partner sex…I think my biggest issue is my mind and psyching myself out.. ---
**Author:** ![anon43014402](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8edcca/32.png) [@anon43014402](https://community.mymojo.com/u/anon43014402)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2026, 7:50am UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/10 "2026-06-30T07:50:23Z")
i don’t want to feel difficult or feel like im applying pressure or expectations during sex, it needs to feel easy and flowy and fun, however in pursuit of making sex easy and fun i begin to put my own needs on the back burner ---
**Author:** ![entire-gold-shark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dbc845/32.png) [@entire-gold-shark](https://community.mymojo.com/u/entire-gold-shark)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2026, 9:52pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/11 "2026-06-30T21:52:51Z")
A fear of ruining the mood, being difficult ---
**Author:** ![rapid-rose-cuckoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecd19e/32.png) [@rapid-rose-cuckoo](https://community.mymojo.com/u/rapid-rose-cuckoo)\ **Post date:** [July 1, 2026, 1:57pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/12 "2026-07-01T13:57:43Z")
Fear of ruining the mood because it has in the past. And fear of being dismissed after making myself more vulnerable. ---
**Author:** ![selective-chocolate-orca](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/edb3f5/32.png) [@selective-chocolate-orca](https://community.mymojo.com/u/selective-chocolate-orca)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2026, 7:06pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/13 "2026-07-03T19:06:41Z")
did not know how to explainwhat I wanted or needed. ---
**Author:** ![vivacious-indigo-thrush](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/22d042/32.png) [@vivacious-indigo-thrush](https://community.mymojo.com/u/vivacious-indigo-thrush)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2026, 10:02pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/14 "2026-07-03T22:02:37Z")
I don’t know how to say what I want, it’s easier to pretend ---
**Author:** ![anon7889048](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed655f/32.png) [@anon7889048](https://community.mymojo.com/u/anon7889048)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2026, 6:00am UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/15 "2026-07-04T06:00:09Z")
I don’t know how to explain what I like because I feel like it’s so different on my own vs with a partner ---
**Author:** ![hissing-gray-seahorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3e96dc/32.png) [@hissing-gray-seahorse](https://community.mymojo.com/u/hissing-gray-seahorse)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2026, 9:12pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/16 "2026-07-04T21:12:15Z")
I don’t want them to overthink it or for it to get monotonous, I also don’t want them to use it to manipulate me ---
**Author:** ![hissing-gray-seahorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3e96dc/32.png) [@hissing-gray-seahorse](https://community.mymojo.com/u/hissing-gray-seahorse)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2026, 9:13pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/17 "2026-07-04T21:13:14Z")
Also I’ve tried communicating and I feel like men just don’t listen ---
**Author:** ![mute-coffee-ape](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/58956e/32.png) [@mute-coffee-ape](https://community.mymojo.com/u/mute-coffee-ape)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2026, 8:49pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/18 "2026-07-05T20:49:33Z")
I don’t know what I want. I’ve never orgasmed on my own either! ---
**Author:** ![mute-coffee-ape](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/58956e/32.png) [@mute-coffee-ape](https://community.mymojo.com/u/mute-coffee-ape)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2026, 8:50pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/19 "2026-07-05T20:50:03Z")
Omg this is encouraging ---
**Author:** ![peaceful-orange-louse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/58f4c7/32.png) [@peaceful-orange-louse](https://community.mymojo.com/u/peaceful-orange-louse)\ **Post date:** [July 6, 2026, 3:29pm UTC](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585/20 "2026-07-06T15:29:51Z")
I think shame, and I don’t want my partner to think I don’t find them attractive [Next page](https://community.mymojo.com/t/what-has-stopped-you-from-communicating-what-you-need-to-be-able-to-orgasm-during-partnered-sex/15585.md?page=2)