I was in a relationship for almost 2 years and 90% of the time I failed to get it up. I started using pills to help me get up but there were times that I did but I would last maybe 20 seconds max. every time we tried to do something it was like my mind switched into spectator mode and I didn’t feel much and it was like I was constantly building to ejaculation. We broke up a few weeks ago and I found out about this app and it’s helped me feel a sense of confidence in myself and in my head but theres still a fear in the back saying it still won’t work next time. When I get these thoughts I feel like I go back to how I used to be but when I’m not I feel like I have full control over my body.
I’m in the same boat and we actually got engaged (to my surprise the bad sex on my part wasn’t a dealbreaker for her and she even said it herself) but still I’m working on getting out of my head and be in the moment when having sex with her. By any chance do you feel a guilt that you have feelings for someone else or was that girlfriend not your type, in an emotional way?
I have been there. My biggest piece of advice to you is to make sure that you’re not suffering from anything physical. I was suffering from Venous Leakage for DECADES, and it wasn’t until I went to a urologist in Colombia that I was diagnosed. I had been to several top Urologists in the US, but they always just threw pills at me and suggested that it was mental. No, it wasn’t. On top of that, my testosterone was very low along with my Vitamin D levels. I had surgery for the Venous Leakage in Colombia and just began working with a device called Vertica (look it up). It’s so easy to put problems on our mental headspace and “confidence”, but you’ve got to make sure, physically, that you’re okay. Once you do that, it’s cool to start work internally.
Well..in my case it was not just this app. I find some of the exercises are good, but the real solution for this kind of issues is therapy. Actually, my therapist recommended chatgpt for starting a sexual therapy as the basis and structure of the therapy it’s actually pretty simple. It’s life changing. There are simple things you need to start focusing on before sex, or things you need to discuss, and weight you need to ditch in order for your mind to start relating sex to a good and safe activity. And the incredible thing is, that when the mind finally let go of worries and anxiety, the sexual performance isn’t there anymore and your body suddenly starts working. It’s such an incredible feeling. Please, follow my advice: sexual therapy works. Early this year I dated twice and it was bad, and I mean really bad. I couldn’t get it up even after taking Cialis and some drinks to relax. Fast forward to now, and one night I had sex twice, hard as a rock. The combination of sexual therapy, this app (particularly the breathing and meditation) and kegels (especially relaxing) work.