So I was experiencing PED problems with my last girlfriend all the way till we broke up, then I didn’t know how to help it, but in the summer I had a one night stand with a girl on holiday and it worked perfectly. I thought I was making progress and I was free of this burden. But now I’m seeing a new girl that I like a lot but everytime we go to have sex I go soft, be it when she goes to touch me or after I put the condom on. Usually right as I’m trying to stick it in it just loses all structure. Last time it happened there she started panicking and saying not again. I hadn’t been completely honest with her about the issues I said if was nerves but I didn’t tell her this had been a long standing issue for me. We talked about it for liek an hr, she still thinks it’s to do with me not being attracted to her but that’s not the case at all. After a lot of convincing and being vulnerable and explaining why I’m afraid she agreed to not stop seeing each other for right now, and we will make one more attempt to see if we can fix my issue. But that experience made me live every fear I’ve been worried about which is causing the issues. I don’t want to lose this girl and she’s being really good with it she is just self conscious that she thinks I don’t like her. I’m really taking a hit to my confidence and mental health, I’ve never felt so alone and lost. Any advice would be so appreciated
You are not alone, I am in an almost identical local situation.
You will have ups and downs as you continue to work on yourself. Some times things will seem like they are going really well, and then a slight change in your personal life might come along and knock you down a peg, it’s then that you need to dig deep and smash out these sessions on this app.
To help with your confidence in yourself and her confidence in herself, maybe discuss the talking points that are raised to you by the AI consultant on here, and let her know the different techniques that you are trying when she isn’t there.
Saying “one more time” can put a lot of pressure on you both. Maybe slow it down, keep talking and being open and vulnerable (even show her this app and this conversation), please her orally and let her do you orally (if it’s easier to get it up with that). I recently had a nightmare scenario, first time with a girl I liked a lot and it wasn’t working. She even asked me “what’s wrong with your dick” which was crushing. After comminication and other attempts, even though they weren’t perfect, they were better. There are websites where you can get some cialis or viagra that can give you a boost, but it doesn’t work 100% when your head isn’t in the right space. Keep communicating with your girl, keep using exercises here like silencing the inner critic and negative thoughts, don’t be too hard on yourself and move forward a
patiently and openly. The girl I’m seeing now is the first I’ve told about this issue. It got to a point where I felt I had nothing to lose, I either don’t tell her and maybe she leaves, or I tell her and maybe she leaves, maybe she doesn’t. I told her and she was understanding and supportive. Best of luck to you, I, and many other men, know what you’re going through and how it feels 
Thank you very much I appreciate the response, yeah I know one more time is probably making it worse but I thought one more time where I can try an fix it is better than none. I’ve shown her the app and told her about the problem and it definitely did make her believe it more and understand, but she still thinks it’s to do with her at the same time, like part of her believes that’s still th reason. I’ve tried Viagra the last 2 times and I’m fine getting an erection but it’s as soon as I go to stick it in I instantly lose it within a second. In terms of the self critic I probably should do more of the exercises but I’ve done a few already and I just don’t know if it’s helping. Like I’m tryna stay focused on it but just part of me is thinking how is this gonna help me in the moment. I understand what you’re going through with your girl saying what’s wrong with your dick and it being crushing. There is no worse moment and I feel for you. Good luck to you too on your journey
Thanks for the advice, yeah I’m gonna try to use the app more than I have before, but I’m just feeling like it is hopeless. I do th sessions then in the moment don’t see how it helps or not, but maybe the problem is my mentality. I jsur want this nightmare to be over. I’ll see if she wants to see what’s on the app but when I was explaining it all I tried to show her th app and she wasn’t bothered in seeing it
Ive had the exact same struggles. I think its crazy but the key to performing is akin to just not caring. Put emphasis on the not caring part but translate it as “just worrying about enjoying yourself”. Youre much more worried about performing because you like her. When it was a one night stand and the stakes were really low, you worked just fine. Remember thats its a psychological problem and that it is fixable. Youre not broken! I asked my girlfriend to just be patient. What I do with her is makeout with her because I enjoy it a lot and it makes my mind go blank. While we do that, I prep myself and it gets up pretty quick and we’re always golden after that. Just have the conversation with her and ask if you can figure it out together. The more successes you have, the more confidence you’ll gain. The conversations are super awkward at first but they are a good measure of whether or not shes a keeper.
Unfortunately, this is like a vicous cycle, the more you think about it the more likely you will have ED. You can try elongating the sex period by longer foreplay, using toys. Light a candle in the room, touch her whole body and just slow things down. Also, tell her often how she is so sexy, she turns you on throughout the day and sex.